Once in a blue moon June 22, 2011

hm…what to write? hahaha i feel like a stupid girl. I don’t know what to write. I’ve been sitting in front of my laptop for 15 minutes, and have no inspiration on what to write.

ok…i admit it, I stop to write in my blog because I have my reasons. first, I don’t want to sit and write. I want to act. that’s why I choose not to write,instead i’m living my life. second, I don’t want to share my personal experiences. hahaha I got to this point where I don’t want to say any names. telling a story needs names…and if it means my friends’ …hahaha after more than a year live in Taiwan, you’ll get more personal with your friends. and you don’t want to share it to some strangers who read your blog by coincidence. ^^

anyway, now I’m writing….probably will spill some names, but hopefully won’t spreading any private information. hehehe *crossing my fingers on that*

what story? ok…emmh…lemme think. Have I told you, I graduated? hehhehehe

yeaaah…i graduated like…12 days ago. It was fun. My mom and dad were there. So it’s like my bachelor’s graduation ceremony, with different graduation gown. hehehehe  few days before, I took them traveling around Taipei, Kaohsiung and Tainan. but the best part was when I showed them the places I often go to. Introducing them to my friends whom I often hang out with. too bad I can’t introduce them to Martin. he’s  the first person I told about my hope of having my parents for my graduation day.

For your information,graduation day is like HG…(read: Holy Grail) for a single person. it’s different with wedding day…which is also a HG, but this one, is so special, because you have spent several years to get one degree.  my biggest wish was to have my parents to attend my graduation day. Alhamdulillah thanks to 4w1 SWT, I got my parents in my graduation day.

Hm…what next? hehehe I also need to think about that. LIFE…needs to live it. geez…i sound like some old dudes. Anyway, I’m excited to go back to Indonesia. scared too though…who’s not? with all the easy life here, yup, i’m definitely scared to go back. but I’m happy with me going-back-home. one step closer to my dream of course

jodoh April 15, 2011

jodoh…when i checked this word in www.kamus.net the translation for English word on this word is : mate / partner. but if we put it in the same context when Sudi told me about this word, it’s probably better suited with the word: FATE. what context?

Sudi is one on my juniors in STU. she’s chinese-indonesian, who has lived in Medan, Indonesia for the majority years of her lifetime. So the influence of Chinese culture is strongly attached in this girl mind. I learnt a lot about chinese-indonesian culture from her.

These days, i hang out a lot with her and Oei. Oei is chinese-indonesian who comes from the same hometown like i do. We have the same dialect, and we know the same hang out places…since we share the same hometown ^^

anyway, back to jodoh thing…when we’re chatting late at night,we usually buy lemon garlic chicken from the street vendor near our uni, and come back to Oei’s room to chat. we will surely talk about something in general. since Oei is still 16 years old, and we can not talk about Business Administration stuff, the reason is because I and Sudi already tired of it.hahahaha enough with the class stuff for leisure time-chat ^^;

the things we love to discuss mostly, are;

1. nail polish. Oei is a big fan of Korean’s make up style: called Ullzang. i knew this because i saw her browsing at youtube when we’re hanging out in her room. anyway, because her makeup products mostly koreans, and i also fond of makeup stuff…so we have good connection when we’re discussing makeup. we usually polish our nails in Oei’s room…and checking each others nails ,

2. daily stuff….ok. actually from this daily stuff will also include, mysticism, boys, how to deal with bitches…that kind of stuff. hey , come on…we’re just girls ok! hahaha none of our conversation will include nuclear radiation in japan, what’s the latest development of cloud computing, the next hybrid cars…nada! we’re sophisticated girls with girly minds. our heart is filled with pinky stuff…so, just pray for the world peace. gigigigi (i’m sure you get the point guys…^^;)

in this daily stuff discussion…we ever chat about the cities that we’ve been to. Sudi from her experience, she’s been living in Medan, Indonesia for more than 20 years. and she felt that she wants to move out from her comfort zone. she told me that she ever prayed to  the temple where she asked the fortune teller about her future. the fortune teller told her that she will get better future in a place across the ocean.

she mentioned that Jakarta is the city she likes, and she felt has “jodoh” with Jakarta. she asked me about the city that is “jodoh” with me…

For me…the city that i like is : SURABAYA.yeaah..my hometown it is. but somehow…(i’ve spent 17 years of my life there…and have best friends there, best culinary there, and most of my families are there too)…it seems like for this time, Surabaya is not “jodoh” with me yet.

I told Sudi that…the city that i least prefer to be my city, turned out to be “jodoh” with me. Jakarta. the capital of Indonesia. i personally don’t like that city. hahaha it’s ok with their shopping malls…but i know it will probably never become my comfort zone.

although in my own term, i don’t have the concept of “jodoh”…but i thank Sudi for introducing me with that concept. hahaha i realized that the place that you love the most, probably is not the best place for you to grow up. i’m longing for my days to come back to my comfort zone (of course)..but will it become my comfort zone again? after 8 years not living there…let’s see^^

only time will tell in the mean time, i’ll enjoy myself here ^^

things i had done these past 3 months March 10, 2011

what had happened this past 3-4 months, in my life:

 

1. my sister got married

2. I went back home to Indonesia, to attend my sister’s wedding.

3. Met my boyfriend…and falling for him..deeper and deeper

4. found out that one of my relatives got cancer

5. met my uncle’s newly wed-wife ^^

6. met my old friends in Malaysia and Thailand

7. met nice Australian (Pakistani origin) guy in Thailand

8. met nice-but-pervert-trying-to-be-gentleman Iranian guy in Thailand

9. met 2 lovely Indonesian ladies who saved me from the (above) Iranian guy..in Thailand

10. met lady traveler from Indonesia in Thailand

11. met cute Thai moslem girl in KL, Malaysia…on our way to go to Bangkok,Thailand.

12. met lots of friends in Surabaya, Indonesia. ^^

hm…i think that’s about it. hehehe

 

alhamdulillah ya Rabb.

 

3 things ;) November 27, 2010

Hohohoho…One of the best jokes i found this month is that…I noticed my friend’s blog who mention my name and recognized me as a person who talks mainly about : SEX, BOYS and COSMETICS.

 

=)) Things hardly change these years aye? Fyi, We’re friends since we both study in Tainan, so she knows me for about a year now… anyway, that’s true. those three stuff are my favorite subjects to talk about (since high school life). especially with my girlfriends…hohoho although some of them are not into cosmetics…wekekek.

 

I’m not really really a cosmetics person (I don’t put on makeup every single day^^; d’oh)…but I am excited to put it on, and to check myself in the mirror..to see how more beautiful I am. (narcisscus girl is in da house That’s why I luv any special occasion to show off my makeup face.

Taipei Gig

For me , makeup is important. It’s not like I can’t live without it. but sometimes, for special occasions you need to put on some blush on your cheek…some lipgloss on your lips, to respect others.

 

Respect? what do i mean with respect? hahaha…if You’re invited in some functions, let’s say…wedding reception. At least, you have to show up with a special dress, right? a special dress to honor the one who invites you. The same with makeup…you’re willing to spend 30minutes-1 hour of your time to pay respect to the one who invites you. that’s how I see people with makeup. hehehe thumbs up for them who can put it on everyday d^^b

 

Anyway, that’s a hassle for me to do it often…hehehe that’s why i only put on makeup whenever i think the event is special. or…let’s say.. there’s cute guys there. (remember! my other favorite subject is about BOYS).

 

The same with boys and their toys…I take cosmetics as my toys. hehehehe and I do know quality!! Colors and price are important…but also the compatibility with your skin. Once, i ever dealing with product that was generally used without seeing the compatibility with people skins. Huaaah!! I learnt my lesson, my next occasion, should be better than that one. (i got acnes after wearing the foundation…and the foundation color’s is not the same with some of the dancers’ skin shades)

My first public show..I was so excited with it

Hehehe anyway, I’m just blabbing in my blog this time…err…ok, actually, i blab all of the time in my blog ^^v hope you like my post this time

my thoughts October 29, 2010

Mauricio is one of my college friends here in Taiwan. He is not that special…except for his brilliance in drawing buildings and a nice  buddy to talk together about music. But despite the whole guy-next-door personality.. he gave me something so particular that I will remember it for the rest of my life. He gave me courage.

 

not courage…courage …as in constant supports saying “加油” all the time, and be there for me always. hehehe that’s what my boyfriend’s does…and I am grateful for that. (alhamdulillahirobbil alamin)

mauricio gave me courage in such a random way.

If I have to define our kind of friendship…I will say, he’s someone that I will have a chat with whenever I see him accidentally. ha ha ha And we somehow, often meet each other in jogging track. where I will listen to my music..and enjoying walking the track without have to care about anything else.

Our discussion will be about general conversation, things that common to say in daily conversation.

until that day, when i saw him with bandage on his face. I forgot where it was…but it’s kinda weird to see the bandage on somebody’s face, right? So i asked him, what happened to his face. He said, it’s just acne that hurts…and he decided to take it out. the simple way of saying. but when he showed me the stitches beneath that bandage…man, it looks awful.

I didn’t know what that “acne” was…until the other day, he said in a very casual conversation between us-buddies, that it’s actually cyst.

I know i might be a bit dramatizing this whole stitches thing…but to have some stitches like that on your face. shoot…It’s the face! THE FACE=the asset! THE ASSET! As in, flirting with anyone will have the chance of more than 50% to succeed if you have THE FACE. so yeah…It’s Important!

I didn’t really take that thing seriously…until that day. The day when I found out, I got lump on my breast. I was scared like shit…scared that I haven’t got married, I might be dead soon…and all those bad thoughts about the future.

I was scared to find the truth too. too scared even to go see the doctor and get my breasts examined.

but then…after some walking-just-by-myself nights, thinking about life and what it takes to have the worst thing happened…I finally decided to get myself examined.

one of my thoughts..bad thoughts of course, is to have scar on my breast. the scar resulting from taking..whatever is that in it. But then, suddenly I think about Mauricio. Think  about the scar on his face. hahaha probably he will hate me for taking him as an example like this. My thought: He’s not scared to leave mark of stitches on his face…the asset! and if I have the same scar, I have it underneath my clothes. hehehe I know it’s not really that simple. But i’m trying to survive in those gloomy days with simple thoughts. so I thought….Fuck it. I’ll get myself examined.

Of course I told my boyfriend all about this…hehehe I need to prepare him for the worst part too. just in case…

and man, he’s more than just a boyfriend… he’s my personal jester hehehe. He tried to keep my mind off from those bad thoughts with some weird jokes… ha ha ha of course in that time of days, I would take any jokes as dry jokes. but, he stayed there, listening to whatever i have in minds. even until this very moment.

anyway, from a friend’s suggestion, I took the ultrasonography  breast examination. I was stressed out that day, I told my family about it…and ask for their prayers support. Even several nights before..I hardly could sleep.

I asked some moral support from my friend, Nadia. hehehehe I didn’t like to feel alone, when dealing with the whole examination process. It’s scary. And Nadia helped me a lot by not saying anything to our friends, hehehe she even lied just to find alibi to go with me…when our friends curious about whereabout we gone to.

When the result came out…ALHAMDULILLAHIROBBIL ALAMIN. the doctor said that the lump was a general lump which caused by too many salty food and water during my period moment. so I should reduce it in order to get rid of it.

And guess what? When I came back from the hospital.. I met Mauricio  on my way back, and  I said thanks to him for simple thing from him that made me gone through this whole examination…of course he doesn’t know that it’s a lump on my breast. hehe

I am thankful for having all the wonderful people surround me. Thank you Ya Rabb…

l’histoire de moi September 15, 2010

je suis tres content au ce moment. parce que a l’universite il y a une nouvelle etudiante qui vient de France. elle s’appelle Hyacintha. elle m’aide retrouver mon francais. hehehe je ne parle pas jamais francais a cette l’universite depuis longtemps. C’est un sur que je peux parler avec Sara, mon autre amie qui est aussi une francaise. Mais, je n’ai pas de courage pour parler tojours en francais. Je pense que je suis a Taiwan, pourquoi j’essaie tres dure parler francais. C’est trop pour moi!

Hyacintha m’aide beaucoup parce qu’elle me donne un Web que montrer beaucoup des TV series. Ces TV series ont sous-titres…en francais! voila! ca m’aide beacoup de retrouver mon francais. Franchement, j’ai manquer des vocabulaires. Alors, ces TV series vraiment est un miracle! Elles me donnent nouveaux mots..que je sais pas jamais dans mon cours de francais quand je suis ete a surabaya ou bandung.

beach-ing ;D August 19, 2010

i hope you like the song that i shown you above…it’s one of my favorites now in my playlist ;D  it’s been a while since my last post in this blog ^^; I’ve been really preoccupied with other stuff which is way much interesting than writing!! ;D hohoho can you believe that? nope…it’s not reading books. (even pile of books still untouchable…stays right next to this laptop T.T hiks32 )

wanna know what’s that? hohoho..its a S.E.C.R.E.T gigigigi

anyway, this thing got my interest so much…even i got sick because of it. hahaha like always. i always get sick if I push myself too much in doing things that i love.

as a refreshing, i often hanging out with my girlfriends. the farthest hangout was gone to Kaohsiung. we spent the day playing at the beach. It was SUPERB!!! hohoho fyi, the beach was recommended by one of our seniors (he lives in Kaohsiung recently).

He said that the beach is awesome, almost no taiwanese swims there. it’s  kinda clandestine…people know, but people dont talk about it. hehehe

that’s why, when we got there, we found some naked guys. Huaaahhh!!! it was scary!!! beautiful beach with bushes?? never dreamt about it. if they’re hot like..let’s say, naked Channing Tatum…hohoho i’d straight taking my camera out from my bag and take pictures of that hot naked guy. but it’s not T.T

so…no pics with the naked guys on that beach ;D

the only style of swimming that i know of..is the floating one. you’re floating with your face facing to the sky but at that time…i couldnt get myself floated. I think because I wore jeans. I forgot to bring any swimsuit with me when I came here. (I thought there’s no special indoor swimming pool just for girls, like the one we have in Indonesia ^^;)

but, the whole trip to the beach in Kaohsiung was so damn FUN! hohohoho can’t wait for the next trip to go there again…this time, It’s BBQ partehh!! ;D

The next cover for Sports Illustrated Magz

opening my eyes July 13, 2010

i just had a down moment a while ago. hahaha probably it’s something hormonal, but then i found out something that really got me down (after the hormonal stuff ^^;). The thing that I’ve been waiting for this whole week, the BIG opportunity…turns out to be  not for me T.T hiks43

a bit sad, but then this whole day also got me really exhausted (back and forth tainan-kaohsiung-tainan)…i then tried to wipe it off by reading a book. HAHA

silly me. check out the title :

The Sadeian Woman: An Exercise in Cultural History , by Angela Carter.

The Sadeian Woman

this book got my mood worsened up. FML. (if you’re in your lowest level of mood…DO NOT ever try to read feminist-theoretical-kind of book. book that talks about pornography in a very complex way….you will feel even more depressed^^;)

anyway, i felt drowsy…and also unwell. probably because I was tired and sad, hehehe so i decided to sleep later on. After I woke up, i was still not OK, and I don’t like this feeling.

So, i tried to find my own remedy. I watched the movie that’s in my hard disk memory. HONEY. it’s a dance movie. the actress is Jessica Alba. not so serious movie…the thing i needed the most.

And i got myself enlightened. hahaha (I know most of the times i luv to exaggerating stuff hahaha…drama queen-wannabe.) but this one is true. from the movie…i see myself (okey, i know that i don’t have that hot bod like jessica alba…but i got the skin!! hahaha *positive-with-my-life-attitude*) wanna do something positive for other people. and the thing that got me down…actually not making me do something positive for other people. actually it’s just fulfilling my ego of having acknowledgement from other people. HAHA phabs and her egocentricity.

anyway, I am feeling grateful to Allah The Mighty…because before this “thing” that got me down…Allah even already gave me things that’s beyond great. hihihihi Allah luvs me. mmmmuuuach. Alhamdulillahirobbil alamin.

cool and poor June 27, 2010

few days ago, i just experienced  my first experience of feeling  so poor. i was broke.

it’s not that i never experienced having no money on my pocket.. i often felt that during my undergrad years. but i was okay. cos i still have my dad. (having someone to back me up if my bank savings account goes to 3 digit. (in dollar currency..it means cents hunny ^^;) or even my auntie, someone who will feel sorry for me in an instant…and will definitely drop me some money IF i tell her i have nothing else to eat (you will pick feminine figure to beg to..because they tend to be emotionally easy to feel sorry for your misfortune ^^;)

but it was back in indonesia…when my someone-i can-beg-for-money-to was just 20 km away. but in taiwan, it’s like….hell.

shit! you try to hang on to the last piece of cents that you still have. borrowing money from your friend, that you assumed have hobbies: everything except for shopping.

and all you can think of is how you can survive for the coming days….damn, it felt frustrating!

Poor me....

what i hate of being poor at that time..it made me becoming a jerk. fyi, i have this big capability in saying sadistic words. hahaha i try to tone it down these years…by keep saying good stuff, love stuff,…funny stuff. but to experience myself having short of money…such nerves!

gosh, now i know how does my mom feel when she’s out of money. hahaha (man, it sucks!)

anyway, i said bad stuff finally…to someone who actually buzzed me to ask for information on essay assignment….hahaha bad timing my mate ^^;  (je suis desolee)

ok, this blog is not that kind of blog which will give you solutions on every problem in life that you will have. it’s not a “how to” blog!

i will probably gonna suffer another breakdown due to lack of  money. and probably will said sadistic, bitching stuff whenever i have this phenomena.

so….if you’re around me …and i’m being such an irritating little girl. you can bet, i’m out of money, or i’m having my PMS.

Missing Him So Bad… May 26, 2010

Just 2 days ago, when i had this conversation with one of my friends in facebook chat room. I was chatting with Matt (New Zealander who lives in Oz), I needed him to explain me about the Permanent Resident stuff in NZ (Thanks Matt . The thing that got my interest because of my previous chat with one of the undergraduate Taiwanese student in the Language Center.

Anyway, somehow the chat with Matt lead us to talk about how Asian Father think about their kids. I forgot how it got to that part…but Matt gave me this link of blog, about High Expectations Asian Father.  And it was hilarious to read comments about how Asian Father expects lots from their kids.

And Matt told me about this one stuff that crack him up real good… “WHY YOU GET C? YOU’RE NOT C-SIAN NOR B-SIAN, YOU’RE A-SIAN” hahaha I was just laughing to read that. since I didn’t think I ever get the same pressure from my Asian Father.

Anyway, Not until Today. When I just had a chat with my Dad on YM Chatroom. It was a quick chat we had then. I didn’t get to tell him that I miss him..perhaps i will weep my eyes when i tell him that.  fyi,  I always cry everytime i’m on the phone with my boyfriend. It’s not that I love him more than my family…it’s just crying will only make it worse. hahaha I think I can not stand longer to be here…if I often cry.

Back to the A-sian Joke, hahaha my dad asked me about my SCORES!! hahaha my dad who seldom talks about my scores…except talking about how to get myself a scholarship, is now into my scores! and guess what did I answer him with? I told him, “My scores are bad, but it’s ok. at least I was honest in gaining them…there’s lots who cheat here.”

And then, My dad replied, “Yeah, as long as you get A A A A A A .” hah? hahahahaha too late my best beloved daddy. I already got red marks for some of my courses ^^;

But it’s true…I learn a lot from here. how to deal with scores. Thanks to some friends who have taught me a lot on the essence of gaining knowledge. not just scores that you’re aftering…but the goal why you even be here. For me…I don’t really care about scores. Except how to make it enough to pass the requirement for getting me full stipend for the second term.

Is he that “Asian”?  Just like the typical-Asian-Father shown in the blog that i gave you the link above?

I dare to say: NO. especially for this part.

My dad definitely not this type!

Hahahaha He is super cool. Strict yet with principle. And he’s fat too…hihihi he loves to eat. And buffet i think is one of his way to get rid of stress. so fasting for tomorrow’s buffet…is never been in our family history.

But there’s this one (from too many stuffs) that i adore him for. His thought about taking his kids to the fanciest restaurant in town.

As you probably knew it already…as a youngster the peer pressure is the most difficult thing to resist. And my dad didn’t want that to get into his kids. He told me that his kids need to have their own mind. Not just following others….how did he cope with that? he took us (the kids) to the fanciest restaurant in town. So that next time, when his kids’ friends luring them with fancy stuff..or food…hahaha (starving kids are in the house), we won’t get easily seduced by that. Been There Done That.

I luv My Dad.